My love story with electronic music started around the age of sixteen, when a friend invited me to a club that was known for its Wednesday night events. It was like nothing I had experienced before. For a few hours, time was suspended, worries faded away and we could just live in the intensity of the music, transported by the bass frequencies that were perceived as more than sound. They also had a texture, it was music I could feel in my chest and in my bones. Back then, Dubstep à la Skrillex was all the rage in my corner of the world that is Montreal. Eventually I got bored of its harsh tones, and stopped going to raves, thinking that this had just been a phase I had outgrown.

A few years later, I was reintroduced to the electronic music scene through my boyfriend at the time. He introduced me to his friends, who invited me to my first festival. There were so many eclectic people all together, celebrating life by dancing for hours on end. I felt so alive, so truly alive! Not going to lie, I was intimidated and had always been socially anxious, but I was intrigued and wanted more. So many colors, sounds, people, so much stimuli... but also a lot of drugs. 

(That’s me in the orange and black tank top, dancing away at one of my first festivals)

Parallel to that, I was struggling with the difficulties of having CF while pretending it didn’t exist. I was trying to fit in and I didn’t want to factor in the limitations that come with this illness. I was worried I would be rejected if I wasn’t like everyone else, plus it was fun to not think of my health worries for a few hours. It took me a few hospitalizations to realize that I couldn’t be like everyone else. I had an illness and it would kill me to keep on ignoring it. I eventually came to the realization that I didn’t need any type of substances to enjoy what had kept me interested in raving all this time- the music. If it hits the spot, I don’t need anything more than that to have fun and feel a sense of belonging through shared love of sound with the friends that I had made along the way. 

Time passed, friendships grew and my sense of belonging deepened, even travelling abroad to go to a festival. I became increasingly interested, learning about the history and roots of the genres that I love the most, collecting tracks that scratched my itch. I dreamt of one day being a DJ and learning how to get a crowd moving. Through friends believing in me, I started practicing and finally have started playing in front of crowds this past summer. I’m still at the beginning of this journey, but am already so proud of what it has taken me to get here. I will forever be greatful that I stumbled upon this pocket of the world that has healed so much in me and makes me feel connected to it that much more deeply.